She is home!

Yesterday my mother finally decided it was a good day to go home.  November 23, 2012 at 10:15am Kay was reunited with loving family and all of her best friends who have all passed through the veil.  I am pretty sure it was a JOYOUS reunion on the other side.  Knowing my mother and her friends who all preceded her - they are having some grand times together right now.

And so now I am going to back track a bit ---

On the night of the 21st mom seemed to be showing a few signs she might be in pain so the hospice nurse decided it was best to increase her morphine.  Dad and I spent the day with her and watched her vitals slowly decrease and while it sounds a bit morbid we started to feel a little relief knowing that her end was even closer.

Thursday the 22nd was Thanksgiving day - we actually gathered to have dinner at my dads and had a nurse come in to be with mom for 2 hours so we could all have a much needed break and we also hoped that maybe if mom did not want us present at her passing - she would go then.  Nope, not so.  However we were sure she would pass in the night so I had my dad say his good-byes before he left. 

Friday morning as the sun rose rays were peeking through mom's window. I opened the shades that had been slightly filtering the rays of warmth and light. The room filled with instant warmth and glow - it was so bright, shining right down on her.   There was a "new" feel to this day for sure. Then I realized that today, November 23rd  - the day after Thanksgiving, was the first day of a season my mom loved.  Christmas -- and that meant Christmas music.  So - I changed the station we'd bee lisitening to for the last week non-stop to a station that was playing Christmas music.  It was wonderful. I'm pretty sure she was smiling on the inside :)

I felt a change come over me.

Chris our wonderful Hopsic nurse came in for our daily check - it was becoming very apparent that we had maybe only hours left.  Mary, the hospice caregiver who does the bathing came in to see us.  It was decided that the warm water and loving human touch would be a gift to my mother as she leaves this world.  Mary began giving her a little sponge bath and I started to help her -- I truly believe that the warm water and soft human touch was of great comfort to her and allowed her spirit to fully let go and leave her mortal body behind.  I was so pleased that it was so peaceful for her. 

I kissed her forhead and said, "oh mom...... you did it.  You are done!  I will feel your presence here with me.  Watch over your grandchildren and great grandchildren. I am so happy for you!"

The joy I felt was immeasurable for sure.  I called my husband Devon so he could tell my dad and they could come down to us.  Of course there were some tears but I truly believe that they were tears of relief, not saddness. Tears of joy.  She had completed her earthly mission.

Mom's request was to be cremated and to NOT have a big funeral with a viewing.  She did not want anyone to see her dead - oh mother.  So respecting her wishes we are doing so. The funeral home came to get her and then my father and I followed to set the final arrangements.  Then, Lauren (my eldest daughter) and I dressed my mother's body for her cremation.  It was a very tender and sweet experience - the last bit of service I will ever offer my mother who was such an example of service in her own life. 

Mom's memorial and celebration of a life well lived will be on Tuesday November 27th 11am  at the Rexburg East Stake Center building, LDS church.  We look forward to honoring her, visiting with friends and feeling of everyone's love and support.  We have set aside 45 minutes prior to the service to visit with everyone.

http://www.flammfh.com/fh/obituaries/obituary.cfm?o_id=1831691&fh_id=11942   Please visit this page of her obituary and take a moment to "sign the guest book" - mostly for my father. I will be printing it off and putting it into a book.   While I have recieved numerous messages of comfort via facebook - he's older and doesn't have that avenue for support.  It would be much appreciated. 

Well done Kay, loving wife, dedicated mother, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, neighbor, teacher and lover of children everywhere.